On fire!!!

Hello every one!!
Well, I am on fire...am cooking up a storm n loving it! I love being in the kitchen....best place to keep my mind occupied.
I'll be flying out to Lausanne in a couple of weeks, I can't wait!!!!

An ode to Kalidasa

I had written the following under the title "Ode to Kalidasa" while Aswini was still working in the US last year. Thought today was a good occasion to share! :)

As usual, scroll further down for the original Tamil version...

Rain pours here,
while the sun scorches there
Have the clouds
found a new home?

To bring me your pain
your yearnings, your tears,
Like messengers
have they come?


--

கொடும் வெயில் அங்கே
கொட்டும் மழை இங்கே
மேகங்கள் இல்லத்தை
மாற்றினவோ?

உன் ஏக்கங்கள் எனக்கு
உணர்த்த அவைதான்
மங்கையின் தூதாய்
மாறினவோ?

-Arvind

Certainty balancing Uncertainty

In next 10 months the MBA program would be finished. All our partners would be out of their dungeons like free birds migrating to find their new homes. They would be equipped with new skills and be energized to reach new horizons. They would be probably changed personalities from beginning to end of the course (thanks to self discovery courses and simulation activities that they undergo). But then it’s me too going through a phase of change, learning and realisation. I can think of 10 things that I want to do and had I been in India with family I could have worked towards them. But being alone in an alien country with no specific time period of how long it would take for me to get my citizenship has left me with few choices. A short video call with my family today also made me realise that had I been at home I would’t have felt so lonely and difficult to live. But then I know the fact that I can’t do much. It was a joint decision and I can’t afford to be weak and fall back. I am glad that I have started learning Salsa and being regular to gym. Very soon I shall start studying some part-time course or modules which shall be more fulfilling and keep me busy. I don’t know how long this uncertainty (of living in UK) shall last but the certainty that in next 23 days I would be seeing my partner glows me up... not to forget may be some new friends too :)

Self discovery

Well, it's been a month since we last saw Aman in the flesh, thank god for the various forms of web chatting!! Lol.
I have used this time to figure out for myself what I want to do with my life and where I want to be in a years time. I've always had a passion for cooking, always experimenting with new recipes or coming up with something of my own, and now I've finally decided to use this passion and become something with it. I've started a course which will hopefully better my skills and give me the knowledge I need to become a chef. I want to be a chef. After a very long time I have the drive and desire to do something for myself. The little one will hopefully enjoy the culinary developments, even though all she thinks about now is chocolate!! Lol!
I want our daughter to be able to look at both of us with pride. Her daddy will always be her hero....what will mummy be??

The Indian Winter

A look back at the last one month

Winter is probably the best time to visit the country- especially the southern regions which hardly ever see temperatures dropping below 20 degrees centigrade, even on the coldest of days. Any other year, I would have simply loved it.

But this year isn't every year. This time its different. I would gladly give up the splendid tropical weather for the snow and ice of Lausanne. No amount of vacationing at home, being surrounded by family, being pampered by parents, can lure me into staying here a minute longer than what is necessary. This time its different.

Because I have come here leaving Aswini behind. I left her behind in a new town, a new country- left her to figure out everything on her own. Find her own way to school. Find her own way to the grocery store. Find her own way to the gas station. Cook her own food. Get by on her own without knowing the language. All this in a place where I have lived for almost three years. A place I know well enough to be of great help to her. At a crucial time in her career when I HAVE to help her in anyway I can. Worst of all, I left her behind as soon as we finally got to be in the same continent, let alone the same city, following a prolonged and frustrating long-distance relationship.

A farm in a village near Patiala, Punjab in northern India

But we both knew this needed to be done. I traveled this great country from the north to south, from Madras to Hyderabad to Delhi to Punjab, in the last 20 days- in order to get things done. Important things. Professional as well as personal. A lecture here, a common friend's wedding there. One of us needed to hold good on commitments here. Most of all, one of us needed to be present here for the most important of decisions made by our respective families concerning our relationship and our future together. And I was the only one between the two of us who wasn't booked 7 days a week from 8 AM to 1 AM.

Finally, its all done. Adios India!

3 weeks have passed

Three weeks have passed since Sam left Canada and began his pursuit of happiness.. He started his challenge and I started mine too.. It is not easy to be a single mother for 2 little girls who miss their daddy desperately... This year is not going to be an easy one, but it is a choice.. We made this choice together, so we will make the best out of the year together.. The first week was tough, sad and depressing, but I decided to make the best out of this year.. It will be a good one.. I would focus on the positive aspect of it.. Sam is going to be challenged, is going to build his knowledge and will make his dream come true... By doing this he will be a happier man and he will enjoy what he is doing..
Hopefully this positive look at things continues for the next while, even if we might be faced with some bumps in the road.. We will see, the year is still young..

Harvesting in Solitude

Original version in Tamil below

Just when you took your first steps
My hands let go of your fingers,
Like the bird that pushes its young ones o'er
before they sprout the first feathers

Longings to watch you grow and win
this new battle in the war that's life,
like waves they come out of my heart
headed West, strong and rife

You fill my thoughts this birth of Thai*,
In this body that is, alas, duty bound
like the rice in the sacred pot we cook**
my heart boils and spills around

* Thai (தை) is a month in the Tamil Calendar, beginning sometime around the middle of January, which is ushered in by the harvest festival of Pongal, one of the most important festivities in southern India.

** An important farmers' ritual of Pongal is the boiling of freshly harvested rice in a newly baked mud pot, and letting it spill over. This signifies and celebrates abundance for the seasons to come.

--

சிறகுகள் நீளுவதன்முன்பே
கிளி தன் குஞ்சை வீழ்த்தியதோ? -உன்
விரல்கள் பிடித்து நடப்பதற்குள்- என்
கரங்கள் உன்னை விலகினதோ?

படிப்படியாய் நீ முன்சென்றாய் -அதை
பார்க்க மனம் தான் துடிக்கிறதே
அலைஅலையாய் என் மனதிற்குள் -பல
ஏக்கங்கள் மேற்கே வீசியதே!

தை பிறக்கும் இப்பொன்னாளில் -என்
கண்கள் உன்னை தேடியதே
கடமையால் சிறைபட்ட இவ்வுடலில் -என்
இதயமும் பொங்கியே சிந்தியதே!

- Arvind